While tonight i'm still awake...not sleepy but i'm totally exhausted...You see,the term of 'she' in my humble blog had been keep playing in my head for hours...it is just like keep mingle around in my mind...would i get to meet 'she' again...or it will be words that will stay as my own imagination...
Therefore,at this sec,i would like to talk about 'she' that stays in my heart...that tickles every part of my body..and yah,'she' is one of the reasons why i keep on moving....
'She' is someone that i imagine as my light..not the bright light but the ray of it...a dim of light that shows me the path...the direction that i should head to...Although i'm not sure where this will end but i guess it just have to end somehow..because nothing last for eternity...'She' that i keep mentioning in this medium...a medium of my expression is not an angel...and not even possess a superhuman power...a normal 'she' but somehow 'she' had went alot of experiences that had taught me either directly or indirectly...which make me understand the surprises that lies behind this journey...
'She', i assumed had done alot of mistakes...and while i'm a sinner,i learn from that mistake...While 'she' also had done good deeds that are totally a massive amount i should say ( sorry for the err struncture ) compare to me...and from it, i make it as my motivation...and not forgetting 'she' always piss off...kind hearted and most of all 'she' does not share what 'she' feeling...
While words do not necessaries reflect what in the heart...'she' somehow cling beside by my heart...a place that my soul had prepare for 'she'...and while 'she' might left the palace..i intend to let 'she' stay...while the ghost i am,the shadow 'she' remains...no matter where i go 'she' is always playing in my head...It is hard to go trough the bricks..so i build the bridge just to get near 'she'...It's hardship but i say,why stop....Follow your heart...think when the situation is not in your favour...You just might reach the end if you keep going...and 'she' become a companion in my story...
Even if 'she' does not exist...or does not even acknowledge my existance....i still have to walk to reach her...not for her acceptance but for her recognition...well 'she' is someone that everyone is fighting for...so 'she' is worth fighting for...Not because of 'she' beauty...not even of 'she' wealth...but it just because of 'she'...And hope is just futile...so i must keep praying...because there are things that i could see while my story is someting that i could not prognosticate....
And if you are gonna ask me who is 'she' in my story...'she' does exist out there...and 'she'does stay in me....'she' is my inspiration...'she' the reason why i created this blog...'she' is not perfect but a perfectionist...'she' is not there when i'm in need but 'she' still a faithful companion...'she' is a fighter but yet had a fragile heart...'she' is normal but surpass a man strength....'she' laugh and smile but 'she' cry like a baby...'she' nags like a nanny but at heart 'she' cares...'she' not even want to hurt people feeling but at the end,'she' was trampled...'she' has to lie to safe 'she' because no one will care for her if something outrageous gonna happen...And am i ok if this is 'she'...i replied,a heart that do not compare or judge will accept 'she' as 'she'
Am i gonna meet 'she'...is 'she' gonna dissapear from my mind....
I just pray...
