Risk Taker

I'm not sure why i'm smiling broadly today..Is it because i'm so happy..or is it the 16 hours base camp totally had help me being a better fine man..or maybe i started to understand what does love means..but the thing is..i'm happy..

When i said about being a risk taker..i really mean it brothers and sisters..you could never ever achieve nor win someone heart..whatever you name it..unless you going trough an adversity..an obstacles..it is a must..there is no easy way out..Unless you believe in yourself..then you will never walk that path as a warrior..

Come on..even during the civilization of Islam..The Companions of Rasulullah Alaihi Salawatullahi Wassalaam faced wars..and i mean wars..a test from Allah..To test their faith Ridwanullah Alaihi towards Allah and Alaihi Salawatullahi Wassalaam..And then,what make us so special not to faces the obstacles in our lives..Are we much better than Companions of Alaihi Salawatullahi Wassalaam?

I'm gonna make alot of enemies..and i mean alot...I might gonna make alot of people envy of me..And if only i could prognosticate the future..Walah..it is much better..but it will be no surprise..and fortune-teller i will be..so i just believe in His fate..but i will keep trying..keep improving..keep showering that feeling with sincerity..which of course, is a bit tarnished with betrayal before..but a box of chocolate should do it for now..nah..not gonna use honey..haha

You are just gonna act awkwardly..Its so funny..but it is something you should and must do to gain whatever you ever dream before..When i look around at these tall buildings..20 floors..maybe more...to reach the top..you should take risk..you take the steps..maybe using accessories..just to reach there..

And to her...i just want she to understand that i'm gonna to prove it one more time..that i could be a person or should i say the person to take care of her..but until then i should believe..even though my message sometimes is not being replied...frustrating..but come on..she is not even your wife yet..so pray she will be great...and if you gonna meet her..enjoy the moment and just be yourself...

So until then..Just take good care of yourself..and yah..i miss my mother a lot today..and to understand a woman heart make me understand more about a mother feeling that faced alot of troubles just to take care of a boy who called ilyas..

I just not into english poem

As I sit here gazing out the window,
Instead of working, I’m daydreaming of you...
And wondering if while you’re in your own world,
You’re thinking of me too.

I reminisce about the day we met and how you made me feel,
Looking at the glowing smile on your face,
Staring into your eyes,
Your smell, your touch, your warm embrace

What a special night that was...

And now, I’m starting to feel that warmth inside,
Like nothing or no one else can make me feel...
Butterflies, a constant smile, happy thoughts,
Looking forward to the next time we meet.

What lies ahead, down the road to love?
Can it possibly be what I’ve been hoping for?
All my goals, dreams, passions, hopes...
Glaring now before me with great anticipation.

No one knows what tomorrow brings...
One can only wish and believe...
I have abounding faith that God will take care of me,
And bring the right person into my life.

Could it be you?
Time will tell...
I feel a special bond starting between us,
And so I’m truly hopeful that it is (you).


Haha...hope there will be no misunderstanding to the readers..just trying to apply my limited vocabulary...wondering when will this training will be over...

30 more pages and 2 books left..

Looking at the title itself make me wonder..Gosh...could i extend the time a bit longer..or forever...just do not want it to finish..just do not want the moment to end..If someone gonna ask you..if given a chance to be with your love one..would you like to be with him or her forever..every sec..

If you are gonna say yes..that i will say you are lying..because life is just not about him or her..You also have to think about your family that had took care of you..your comrades..anything or anyone that is precious to you need your attention..even yourself had an ambition to achieve.

If you are gonna say no..that will be ridiculous.even i will acknowledge that you do not love him or her sincerely..Because to spend wonderful moment of chit-chat..looking at the face of your love one is totally making your feeling so relax..as though you are living in heavens..There are seven..so depends on your good deeds...

So i think which might be right or wrong..To love someone is just like craving a box of chocolate..If you gonna eat too much,you will get fat..sickness..maybe heart attack and the feeling of appreciation will slowly fade away..but if you eat the chocolate with the feeling of sensation as though you are having a nice time with it..guess what..that's the moment you become one with the chocolate that melt in your mouth and not in your hand...

But to get fat eating a chocolate is not so bad as it seems...haha...not gonna brag about it no more..my advice..believe in yourself and don't push yourself to the limit that make he or she choke with your attendance..He or she needs some space to breathe...Believe me you could see at their faces...

The Reason

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You


Hoobastank

I'm free

Ironically in life you need to do something that you never ever thought you are gonna do it in life...And today i just did that...The heart that was so fragile had become one again...And it just because i let it all out from my emotional conflict..The inferiority complex...The feeling of being dejected and rejected..The feeling of being accepted..And i feel the air that i breathe which i called love...

Not over-rated myself..but the confidence that i need is totally compiling and reconciling every second...It is not about what you think..Its all about what you do...

And thanks to that moment..A moment that i'm gonna treasure it along this journey..The words of monotone but filled with encouragement..Make me realize and fully understand..The feeling of a woman..To comprehend that standing in front of the door will never change anything...but by entering that door will make you know almost everything about a woman..

Therefore...i'm gonna do what should i do..Enough with the talking..enough with the sweet talk...it is time to make an effort with sincerity and not to tarnish the heart once again..she is observing my movement..and just wanna tell you..thanks for everything..thanks for teaching me a valuable lesson..Although you are small in size but you have a big heart..

One more thing..to anyone who condemned my decision..you will never ever be my rival..it is just the fact a throng of Gladiator is trying to impress the Queen..You just play your part while i play mine..And may the best triumph on the battle field of Rome...

Have you ever loved someone but could not show it...

To realize that you love someone so badly after he or she left you is nothing more than a torment of a lifetime..

I do not understand the saying until i met a wise man who show me the true meaning of loving someone...So the scene goes like this:

I: Sir, how do i know that i really love someone?

Wise man: Do you like your shirt that you are wearing right now?

I: I don't think so...Why? (confused)

Wise man: If you are gonna lost that shirt you are wearing right now on the desert and you are left half naked at the season of winter..What will you feel?

I: I will feel cold Sir..And i will wish how i will not lost it.

Wise man: It means you only realize the importance of the shirt when bad things happen to it which left you regret on the loss..And that is how you measure your love towards someone...

I: Ok...That's cool..but then how will i know that he or she is the one that i love and what should i do for not letting it go?

Wise man:( Looking around him and he grab a stick and trying to beat me with it)

I: ( Without delay,raise my arm to defend myself )

Wise man: ( Smiling ) Why you defend yourself?

I: Instinct...It is because you want to beat me.

Wise man: That's is the answer if you want it to stay..then you will defend it..No matter what the cost is gonna be...You defend yourself because you do not want to be hurt..You defend your love ones because you would never dare to hurt them....

I: (Crying) how pity i am...i loss my love one because i could not defend her..And i only realize how deep my love for her when she gone...

Wise man: Believe young man..May Allah and His Prophet Alaihi Salawatullahi Wassalaam guide your path and meet her again..And strengthen your fragile soul to be one again..

I: Thanks Sir..

Wow...And guess what..the burden in my heart is lift a bit..and now i could understand life a bit clearer....Hope she is reading this...

I'm shouting

At this moment..my heart is shouting loud..my heart is crumble..my heart is uneasy till i lost goodnight sleep..my heart is searching for the answers..my heart is praying for guidance...my heart is asking for forgiveness...

Would i be forgotten by my love ones..would i be gone astray and will never ever walk on a straight path again..would you be my companion if i request..would you listen to my weep if i could not deny being hurt...would you forgive me if i betray you again and again..would you tape my heart if it had broken to pieces...would you heed my advice just because i care for you...would you hold my hand for a while even you are not gonna here...

What kept inside me will always remain a secret..what i shared will always a burden that i could not carry it any longer..

The future is full of surprises..the heart of my love ones is kept just within her..How could i understand when it is not reveal..And how could i act if i do not understand..Oh Allah..please enlighten me with the answer..please connect me to Prophet Alaihi Salawatullahi Wassalaam so i will be calm..Until then,i will just believe....